After graduating from college in 2017, I moved to DC. Now on my own in a new city, the mental health problems that I’d been able to keep at bay with the help of my college friends quickly became too overwhelming to handle. I’d always been a believer, but I turned to God in a new way and with a new desperation during this time.
I bought a new Bible and read every page, underlining passages, writing notes in the margins, and allowing myself to fully be immersed in God’s word. My Catholic schooling had focused heavily on the New Testament and I was amazed to find so many stories in the Old Testament that spoke to me so clearly.
I was absolutely shocked by Hannah’s story in 1 Samuel. Here is a woman who was so clearly dealing with depression: unable to eat, facing feelings of inadequacy, and being constantly reminded of her shortcomings. She was a great reminder to me that, when caught in that moment of feeling so powerless, we can rely on God’s power. She prays so fiercely that Eli thinks she is drunk and she promises that if God will bless her with a child, she will dedicate that child to serving Him. When God grants her Samuel, she prays a deep and powerful prayer about God’s power and love for the lowly. And, after Hannah dedicated Samuel to God, He blesses her with FIVE more children! From begging for one child to being so incredibly blessed by God. From desperation to a joy she could not previously have imagined.
And that’s what I need in those moments. The promise of a joy that, in the depths of my depression, I could not have imagined. And He has delivered ALREADY. Never, during my days crying incessantly over that Bible, would I have let myself imagine that I would find a church and a community that is as home to me as Citizen Heights is. Never could I have thought that I would be leading a Team, engaged in Small Groups, and newly baptized! BUT GOD came through. Through the darkness, God gave me my “miracle weekend” (when I found CH on Sunday and my therapist the next day.) He gave me an incredible group of friends and mentors. He gave me a reminder that I am enough as His daughter, regardless of any other label put on me. He continues to give me a hope for the future and I eagerly await the blessings He has in store for me—Possible Awaits!
The Power of Sharing Your Testimony! The Bible reveals two mighty weapons in our arsenal against Satan’s accusations: “the blood of the Lamb” and “the word of their testimony” (Rev. 12:11).SHARE YOUR STORY